Mike said "you need a high waisted pencil skirt - grey if you can find it" so I did. I did it! Under duress from the amazingly talented designer for my new play DESIRE (13-31 July at The White Bear, London - box office: 020 7793 9193 - please come and see it or I will strike you from my FB!) I had to go to... Primark for the very first time.
I went early on Tuesday (they open at 8:30) before rehearsal. It was almost deserted, but even at this hour it had a few die hards getting in a bit of shopping therapy before going to work... Now, I don't usually go shopping for clothes. I'm like one of those poor souls on Gok's Fashion Fix. Shops scare and confuse me. They make my head spin. I walk in and get spat out again like someone who's put too much momentum going through revolving doors. I don't understand for the life of me how anyone can call it shopping therapy...
So imagine my surprise when I walked into Primark and made a bee line for their "tailored corner" and immediately found a rack with grey dresses, matching jackets, trousers and of course... the coveted high waisted pencil skirt... in grey! And I'll share something rather spooky with you: it looked exactly the way it did in my head. Imagine that! I'm on the same existential plane as Primark. I'll say that for Primark, their prices may be low but their designs are anything but cheap. They're very very good and in fashion parlance (gleaned from the rather shrieky but very funny blonde American designer on Gok's Fashion Fix) "on trend".
But there's more... Wait for it...
I did not reach for the size 14 or even size 12... I am getting better, aren't I? I grabbed a size 10, and then almost as an afterthought spotted a lonely size 8 and grabbed that too, just in case. Off to the changing rooms.
The Primark changing rooms could teach the more expensive high street stores a thing or two. They are a thing of beauty: clean, spacious, with good mirrors and lighting.
And in the privacy of my Primark Tardis (you'll only get the reference if you saw my one woman show "There's Something in the Fridge..." - see, better book your tickets to my new play otherwise you'll miss out on all the witty references that I'll be peppering this blog with. Book now! 020 7793 9193.) I tried on size 10 - without any sense of apprehension. I am doing better! And it was too big! Not by much but definitely not fitted the way a pencil skirt should be. So I tried size 8: and bingo!!! It looked f-a-n-t-a-s-t-i-c.
So there you have it, my first amazing shopping experience - since that purple tartan mini-kilt I bought in Edinburgh - was sponsored by Primark! (there's another reference to the one woman show... if you're curious go and read my 2008 Edinburgh Fringe blog "Notes from the Fridge...")
Now, I could include a picture of me in the Primark grey pencil skirt (about £12) and the rest of my delightfully sexy and tight fitting costume but... I won't. If you want to see it, you'll have to come and see the play. The details, one more time in case you weren't paying attention: DESIRE, 13-31 July, The White Bear Theatre, London, Box office: 020 7793 9193.